We Are too Grown for This Shit

July 15, 2018 in Articles - 2 min read

Here’s the sad truth, we are way too old to be beating around the bush when it comes to showing our intentions with someone. Honestly, this is purely complicating life unnecessarily. What do you want? You’ve just exchanged numbers with someone, for what? Friendship? Relationship? Situationship? State it as soon as you can!

Listen, we are all busy – some of us are trying to bag a degree, some of us are working tough 9-5 jobs and some of us are trying to get our businesses off the ground. We. Are. Busy. And on top of that some of us are suffering – being broke, depression, anxiety, pressure, those factors are dragging us by the balls. But here you are, confusing people on what relation you want to have with them. What the actual fuck is wrong with some of yall? 

We are actually old enough to be getting married and start our own family but then again, our age still allows us to loiter around for a good time and nothing but a good time so speak up man. So, we must assume that you want to get married in 3 months or that you just want to smash? Huh? And I don’t want women reading this thinking I am talking to men. First of all, women are the main kings at pretending – they can pretend that they want you when they actually don’t and they can pretend they don’t want you when they totally crave you. So no sis, this is about you too!

Are you trying to get your feelings hurt? No, right? Then simplify your life by telling or asking the person you are ‘vibing’ with what’s happening! Do you want a relationship, a friend or somebody to smash? Yall end up flirting for 584 weeks not knowing where yall stand in each other’s lives, there’s no need for such confusion, we are busy man. 

If yall agree on a relationship then be fully in it, don’t be half in and half out and if your intentions somehow change as time goes by then communicate it with your partner. Even if yall agree on a ‘situationship’ then lay down some rules – how attached should we get? Can I call when I have problems? Do we talk daily or only on the day we meet for a good time? COMMUNICATION IS VITAL! 

Don’t be a piece of shit, gone are those days, in this day and age we talk about what we want instead of wasting people’s time and our own. S’badala. Also, learn how to accept rejection. If you decide into slide in your crush’s DM and they aren’t interested, take your L and move along, you are not gonna die. Pretence is such a heavy thing to maintain, rather just speak up and if they cannot take it in then that’s their own personal problem. 


  • Unmistakably M.E. September 20, 2018 at

    I absolutely love the name of your blog and this series

    • Mbalenhle September 25, 2018 at

      Thank you so much. I’m glad you enjoyed 💕

  • J | thenellybean July 23, 2018 at

    Ahh I can think of so many people who need to read this. Just cowardice when people beat around the bush and string each other along for ages without actually stepping up and making a move.

  • Deshi Nenkinan Nehemiah July 20, 2018 at

    I feel like climbing Mount Everest with a gramophone like what I imagine God’s to be and shouting this post out! Word Sistur !

    We’re getting older and we ain’t got no time to be playing around!

  • SpiritualJourney17 July 18, 2018 at

    Be true to yourself and everything else will fall into place. Great post.

  • tsepotheview July 17, 2018 at

    Sometimes you want something when actually you don’t. If you want to be with someone just be straight forward and tell him/her you want to be with that person most importantly never loose respect for that person then you will automatically love that person.

  • moonlightandmacaroons July 15, 2018 at

    Great post!! 🙂

  • Jheelam July 15, 2018 at

    “they can pretend that they want you when they actually don’t and they can pretend they don’t want you when they totally crave you.”- Lol..with one clean sweep you dashed most of the coquettish heroines of chick-lit. 😛

    And thanks for the word “situationship”. I learned a new word today.

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    About Me

    About Me

    Hi and welcome! My name is Mbalenhle K but everyone calls me Mbali for short (say: mm-bah-lee). I am a freelance copywriter who loves all things art, experiences and aesthetics (big time Pinterest gworl 🧚🏽)! I am the founder of Budding Regardless where I talk about mindfulness, self-development and self-nurturing for creatives. Read More

    Mbalenhle K.

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