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My Commitment Issues

January 20, 2018 in Lifestyle, Personal - 3 min read

I feel as though this is an issue most people have, especially when it comes to relationships but I actually struggle with committing myself to activities.

Movies

I am terrible. I rarely focus on a movie from start to end. Do you have any idea how long 2 hours is? Just listening to people speak and struggling to find a comfortable position to sit in? Sure, I do enjoy the first 15 minutes of the movie but then I end up predicting what will happen as the climax and what the ending will be like. If I don’t predict, I start asking myself unrelated questions like, “What are my plans for tomorrow anyway?” “Do I need to pee right now?”, “Am I hungry”, “When was the last time I cycled around the neighborhood?”, “Should I get my room painted grey or yellow?”.

Facial products

I tried staying loyal to using Avon’s ClearSkin Professional, I failed. I promised myself that I will wash my face every single day of the week maybe for the rest of my life but I actually only did that maybe 3 or 4 days a week (sometimes 5 days… but hardly). So, I gave up on that. Another problem with me is that I simply cannot stick to 1 facial product – if it doesn’t work for me in 1 week, I am moving on. That’s probably why my face hasn’t stopped introducing me to new pimples almost every morning.

Exercising

I would tell myself to exercise for 30 days tops but I legit have never completed even ONE week exercising. Sometimes I feel like I want to see results immediately so I get demotivated to keep working out if I don’t gain arm muscle after 1 dumbbell lift. Also, sometimes (yeah, most of the time actually) I would work out so hard until I can’t walk, talk nor breathe then I’d tell myself, “Time out” and that ‘time out’ accidentally lasts for 15 months.

Studying

Let us not question how I’ve made it this far in life and how I have been getting good marks and some distinctions. I don’t even know. You know how study tips always tell us to study and take breaks in between? Yeah well, I do that too – maximum of 15 minutes dedicated to studying, minimum of 3 hours dedicated to taking a break from all that heavy studying I did in 15 minutes. I got this all figured out.

Reading books

I don’t know how my mind works sometimes hey, I would read a book as far as the last word of the first chapter and feel like I’ve made it in life because that alone is too much commitment for me. I love the idea of reading books and that’s probably why I buy so many of them with intentions to read them but I never do. Well, I do read them, I just don’t finish them. From July, last year, I started reading a book and 7 months later, I am still on Chapter 4.

As it is a new year and all (hahahaha I don’t trust what I am about to say), I will work on this issue I have. I really need to learn to stay committed, especially on these minor activities. Good news is that, for the last 2 weeks, I have been very loyal to my work-out routine and washing my face twice a day. And to help me stay committed to it, I drew up a habit-tracker and that kinda makes sure that I stick to my daily routines. So far so good.

When school opens I will have to create a very realistic study plan – a plan that won’t make it easy for me to get distracted because wow this 15min and 3hr game I play when I’m studying won’t work for me this year. Also, I watch movies from start to end more often now and I will honestly try to read at least 3 books by the end of this year. It’ll be hard but surely worth it.

If you have any problems when it comes to committing yourself to certain tasks too, let me know on the comment section below. That will surely make me feel a whole lot better about myself.

Goodbye for now,
Mbalenhle

19 Comments

  • fraziersracket January 19, 2018 at 21:32

    I feel the same way! Especially movies…that is a long time to set and devote to one thing. I could be doing other things, for sure.

    • Mbalenhle January 22, 2018 at 13:38

      😅I always try to watch 1 movie everyday to get in the habit of concentrating. It feels like punishment 🙆

  • SheerDee January 19, 2018 at 23:31

    Hahaha! Lovely post.

  • SHEinspires January 19, 2018 at 23:56

    That is the story of my life right there! I fall into nearly all the categories you just listed. I also find it hard to focus. If it’s not a really good movie, my mind travels. Let’s not get started on lengthy speeches, talks and church sermons.

    • Mbalenhle January 22, 2018 at 13:37

      😂You just mentioned a good one – church sermons! One of the reasons why I stopped going to church 🙆. I struggle so much with concentrating for a long time, thoughts just wander😩

  • silverliningsblog January 20, 2018 at 02:53

    I’m the worst about things like that too! Especially when it comes to working out and skin care and stuff like that. Some days I do great other times I fall off for a few weeks, I try to not be too hard on myself.

  • randomthoughtsbyhaya January 20, 2018 at 08:12

    I can relate to this post so much lol

    • Mbalenhle January 22, 2018 at 13:37

      I’m glad I’m not the only one 😅

  • LiveNotExist January 20, 2018 at 22:18

    Me too!! Its insane how easily I get destracted🙈😜

    • Mbalenhle January 22, 2018 at 13:37

      😂No matter how hard we try to focus hey

      • LiveNotExist January 22, 2018 at 15:09

        Hehe indeed😂like a KID that suddenly see a butterfly 😜

  • The Style of Laura Jane January 20, 2018 at 22:59

    This made me laugh because it’s so relatable. I am terrible with books. Unless I get stuck in straight away, I usually put aside and then try to reread months later, at which point I’ve forgot the beginning. But I love the idea of reading. And at the cinema I’m terrible. Always worrying I need to go the loo in middle of the film. lol xx

    • Mbalenhle January 22, 2018 at 07:45

      😅l get so happy when l realise that I’m not alone! I really don’t know how some people can read like 2 books a month when l can’t even read 1 book in a year 😄. I’ll probably just keep hoarding them and not reading. I feel like with movies l always get distracted by something then I focus on it throughout the whole movie 🙆 I’m terrible!

  • MissKymmiee January 22, 2018 at 05:50

    Haha! I relate with you on a spiritual level. Great post Hun 💋

    • Mbalenhle January 22, 2018 at 13:39

      😅We have major issues! Thanks love 💖

  • Joan Akob January 27, 2018 at 22:38

    Exercise and me do not mix. No matter how much I try…my initial excitement just fizzles out after a while 😂😂. Very relatable post!

    • Mbalenhle January 30, 2018 at 21:28

      😂I know hey, the excitement fades into thin air after a couple of days with me 🙆😭

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    About Me

    About Me

    Hi! I am Mbalenhle Khuzwayo, but everyone calls me Mbali for short. I am a lifestyle blogger who focuses on mental wellness, travel and social media marketing. Sign up to the monthly newsletter for insights on the personal side of my life and exclusive tips Read More

    Mbalenhle K.

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