First off, let’s be real… meditating is just one of those things that are really hard to get into. You probably know all the benefits of meditating and heard a million times before that it is important to incorporate it into your daily routine.
I know you have tried it out before and gave up and I don’t blame you. What I truly dislike is how meditating (and yoga) has started looking like a thing for “that girl” – people who have their shit together and wake up at 5am to ensure their lives stay better than the rest of us. Lol jk. It’s impressive, it really is because some of us are still trying to figure out why we are even here. So it’s intimidating to hop onto meditating if it’s not for ‘people like you’!
“Bro, this really isn’t for everyone though. Let’s not force it!”
Okay, I hear you but listen, one thing I can absolutely agree with is that meditation is important and needs to be included in your lifestyle. You’ve probably heard gurus saying you need to meditate for at least 20 minutes a day. Excuse me, ‘at least’? The least I can do before thinking about 500 things I need to be doing is 10 seconds at most! You can relate, right?
Let me tell you what meditation helps with though:
- silencing your mind, especially if you are an overthinker like me
- focusing on being here, right now and not worrying about things you cannot control
- realizing that you are not missing out on anything and slowing down
- creating a non-judgemental mindset about yourself and everything around you
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So like I just mentioned, I used to struggle with meditating. I mean STRUGGLE! 10 seconds in and I am already like, ‘Aight, imma head out’! But I really wanted to get into because as you know, I have crippling anxiety and in most cases I just need to quieten my mind. I was desperate to learn.
Sometime in 2019, I discovered the app called Balance and I have been recommending it since then! They have guided meditations which is a good way to start because your focus is solely on the instructors voice and they reassure you that it’s okay to drift off and guide you back to the meditation.
There are many techniques you can learn from them such as Breath Focus, Body Scanning and Visualization. All of which, you can learn to do by yourself as time goes by.
They have all sorts of meditations and an obvious favorite of mine is the Walking meditation. There is a guided meditation for almost every mood. Not only that, if you struggle with sleeping, they have a whole section on that (I sometimes fall asleep while meditating and jump when the instructor gives the next instruction lol)!
The best part? They currently have a sale for the Lifetime plan – it can be yours forever for $139.99 right now! That’s 65% off the original fee!
“Okay Mbali but I can’t sit still to save my life!”
With the way life is so fast paced, it has become so hard to just be still! It almost feels like we are wasting time or missing out on something. That is mainly why meditating feels like a chore or punishment.
Let me tell you something, let me tell you something – you do not necessarily have to sit with your legs crossed and fingers pointing up on your knees, chanting ‘ohm’. Nope, you do not have to do that. Get in a comfortable position, one you can sit in for at least 10 minutes without aching.
My fav position is laying flat on my back, knees up and arms flat on my sides or gently resting on my stomach.
Try out all positions, even sitting on a chair. So long as your body is fully relaxed – drop your shoulders, unclench your jaw, don’t cross your legs or arms. Once you have found the right position, it will just feel right!
“Sure, but I am just gonna be there thinking and overthinking the whole damn time. So what’s the point in trying?”
And that’s normal! Especially if you are just starting off, of course your brain is going to go crazy and try to stop you by convincing you that you could be doing better things out there. It’s just 5 minutes, relax. You have been procrastinating certain tasks for days and weeks but 5 minutes of just doing nothing is a lot now, all of a sudden? Hmm?
A good way to practise slowing down your mind and being present is by placing an object in front of you. Just stare at that object for as long as you can. Let’s say that object is a book. Observe it – what color is it, what is the title, how many pages are there (an estimate), what do you think it smells like, how much does it weigh… yes you are still thinking but it’s not about all the things that you cannot control. It’s about what’s here, right now.
When observing the object, do not judge it.
Don’t: “It is a blue book and the pages are just so dirty. The corners are bent and some of them are even ripped…”
Do: “It is a blue book. Just a little lighter than the sky or maybe as blue as the water in the Maldives. The pages are thin, with orange finger marks on the pages, similar to when you eat cheesy Cheetos/Niknaks…”
See? No judgement, just observing and being aware that that’s there! That’s why I suggest you meditate with your eyes open even when you are comfortable with it. So that when your mind starts to wander, you pull yourself back to the moment by saying something about the object in front of you.
“Practice, practice, practice makes perfect. N**** it’s never too late!”
“I took the ssss outta the snake!” Okay, sorry I got carried away singing Offset’s part on Clout!
But listen, one thing I have to come learn about meditating is that it’s not a goal you can ‘reach’. I mentioned this on my previous post Manifesting and the Myths around it – it is a journey, a never-ending one but it grows you!
Give yourself 5 minutes, actually no… give yourself 3 minutes a day. Create a habit tracker and track your progress. It’s a fun way to see how far you have come and how long you have been trying.
We will definitely be talking more about meditating but for now just use this simple guide to get started. I am rooting for you!
One other news…
Have you heard about the newly launched membership from Budding Regardless? Yuup! It’s a free membership – on the last Sunday of every month I share with you a starter pack to tackling the upcoming month. This is solely created for people who struggle with their mental health like me. But hey, read all about it on the Membership page and I hope to see you in the next virtual retreat! 🧚🏽