It’s the 25^th of February 2019, I’m at the King Shaka International Airport with my family with my whole life packed into two suitcases which my mother had spent the last 2 weeks unpacking and packing every 3/4 days – I’m guessing it was her way of trying to accept that I will be away for a long time. As we wait for the gate for my flight to open, we goofed around and made silly jokes about random stuff as we always do, but no one was actually talking about the fact that for the first time ever, I was about to board a plane alone and not only cross the boarders of my province for the first time but also cross the boarders of my country and the continent too. 

It’s time to say our goodbyes, we are all a bit awkward about it because we have never been away from each other for longer than a week, how is this supposed to go? Are we supposed to cry? Hug longer? Profess our feelings? Or act like this is normal and we are totally going to see each other next week? We went for the latter. The day I had been waiting for, for almost 2 months, had finally arrived, I was not nervous, I did not shed a tear, I was ready – ready to start a new journey alone in the United States of America.

I remember the many times during the course of my degree when I would have meltdowns yet still push myself to work hard because I had a reward for myself in mind – take a gap year to travel and better my mental health. I still applaud myself for doing exactly that. On the 26^th of February 2020, I celebrated surviving living abroad and by ‘celebrate’ I mean ‘lay down on my bed, staring at the ceiling with my hands on my chest and a huge grin on my face’. I thought about all the amazing experiences I have had, all the bold moves I have made, all the great friends I met, all the discoveries and lessons I learnt the hard way and the fun way, I thought about all the little adventures I went on and all the people I inspired. My heart and soul were at peace.

Moving abroad is surely not all sunshine and rainbows as it may seem on the gram, you just learn to see good in every good and bad experience that you have. It changes you, changes the way you think, the way you act and the way you speak. It’s all so overwhelming but you learn to accept the drastic change. The things you see make you think differently, the environment you are in makes you act differently and the people you are surrounded with make you speak differently; it all happens to quick and so naturally, you don’t even notice it until someone from back home mentions it.

Moving abroad is surely not all sunshine and rainbows as it may seem on the gram, you just learn to see good in every good and bad experience that you have.

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Without a doubt culture shock has smacked me on the face when I didn’t even see it coming.  You think you know a country so well, until you actually move there. Now that I live in the US, I have seen the ‘behind-the-scenes’ of how the country functions, I have learnt how to fill up my own gas which is something we don’t do in South Africa and I have gotten used to eating food I don’t quite enjoy. My job has given me the opportunity to live a ‘wealthy’ life, travel the US, understand the American culture and meet people from all over the world.

The biggest lesson I have learnt from living abroad is that life really goes on. Just as I am living my life, everybody else around me is living theirs and we really don’t even owe each other any explanations. My friends and family members are getting engaged, married, having children, moving into their own apartments and sometimes I found out on social media just like everyone else and honestly that’s more or less how it’s supposed to be. It’s almost impossible to keep each other updated about every single thing that happens in our lives because there’s just too much happening. I sometimes find myself mentioning something to my family or friends and their response half the time is like, “Wait, since when did you have…” or “When did you even get that/go there?” because I simply forget to keep them posted, we’re at the age where everything is happening all at once. Good luck with lifting your head up to the surface to grasp some air.

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I have learnt to be alone, learnt to be more understanding of people’s opinions and where they are rooted from and I have learnt to not fear anything. Whatever I set my mind to, I do it. With or without support, I move. I have built higher standards for myself, I do not settle. Living abroad has really reintroduced me to myself and I am absolutely obsessed with the person I have become and the person I am becoming. 

Let me leave you with just this one thing – if you ever get an opportunity to step out of your comfort zone, do not think twice, jump for it. We grow through experiences and we learn through experimenting. Living abroad is probably one of the most rewarding adventure you could ever have, all the good and the bad have something to show you about the world and/or about yourself. Take the leap!

If you ever get an opportunity to step out of your comfort zone, do not think twice, jump for it.

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That’s it for now, iyophind’ ihlangane…