Being Okay With Not Being Okay

We have been fed the idea that we are supposed to be happy every day and not only do we consume this idea, we also promote it and believe in it too. When we are asked how we are doing, we are expected to respond with, “Oh I’m good, thanks!” accompanied by a broad grin despite all the worries we have running through our minds all day and suffering in silence. We all go through hard times and it’s about time we learnt that there is nothing wrong with not being at the top of your game every day.

Usually when things have been going well for a while, they start to fall apart and sometimes things go from bad to worse whenever there is a possibility. In those cases, our instinctive reaction is beating ourselves up for not keeping it together and blaming ourselves for how badly things have turned out, even in situations we have no control over.

You should not have to feel like you have to have everything together each day because every day comes with different possibilities and these possibilities are not just determined by us, everything and everyone can determine how our day will turn out. This is why it is important for us to not only accept the good that is happening in our lives but also accept the bad.

Bad days do not necessarily carry negative connotations, they also play a significant role in making us appreciate the good days that we have because without bad days, there would be no possible way to know what a good day is. If we are constantly okay and thriving, we do not grow mentally and emotionally. Mental and emotional growth stems from traumas, self-doubt and negativity if we are willing to turn those factors into lessons and motivation to get out of the rut.

Healing takes time and if you attempt to skip the healing process by completely ignoring it and putting up a face day to day, things can only get worse because you would be blindly sabotaging your health. It is okay if you haven’t healed from your past traumas so long as you are doing something about it – dealing with the problem, seeking help from a friend, family member or professional therapist, and being honest to yourself about how you feel.

Self-doubt and meltdowns are necessary, just as long as you can control it and not let it control you instead. Life has to have balance – a bit of good and a bit of bad. Dwelling too much on the bad for too long can cause a huge imbalance because what you feed is what grows more. Check up on yourself, commit to daily self-reflection sessions, keep in mind that if you aren’t okay then that’s okay and you are doing the best that you can.